Arriving at a crossroads, or anticipating a change of direction, is deeply personal rollercoaster. Often, we naturally seek out the advice and guidance of those in our lives. Crossroads represent major turning points since no one possesses magical powers or genie bottles for predicting the future. When we reach a turning point, we like to bounce off ideas to those closest in our life, such as boyfriends, spouses, or partners. Since crossroads are often personal journeys, when is it appropriate to heed the advice of others?
When to Ask for Help from a Spouse
Now, there’s a difference between asking for help and asking for someone to think for you. You are the only person with the capacity to make decisions for yourself, since no one knows you better than yourself. However, as stylists, the crossroads we encounter impact our partners. Let’s say you want to relocate to a subdivision in your city because they have more discretionary income, so the tips end up being higher. However, if you moved across the city, your spouse ends up having a longer commute.
This would be the type of decision to run past your partner, especially if you share a living space or have joint accounts. In general, you don’t need a boyfriend’s or spouse’s permission for your actions, but the gesture is one of respect when it directly impacts them.
[tweetthis]”In the pursuit of clarity, be allowing of your own truth.” REBECCA BEARDSLEY[/tweetthis]
What if they present roadblocks that impede your personal growth?
A situational crossroad at work often ends up having a domino effect for better or worse. Let’s go with the above example and assume the partner vetoes your new idea. At this point, you have to address whether the partner’s concerns are realistic. Perhaps, they are pointing out a flaw in the idea that you refused to acknowledge. If you are so set on this new idea, is your relationship holding you back?
Allow their advice sink in and avoid sudden judgments, but the important bit about romantic relationships and advice is pay attention to whether a partner merely disagrees, or is outright disrespectful about your decisions and opinions. If your partner goes about giving their advice in a demeaning way or attacks your ability to reason, it’s time to disregard that advice and perhaps that individual.